discipline

I rack disciprine ^.^'

I feel like I had a lot more discipline when I was younger. Well...there were definitely things I slacked on that I don't anymore, but when it comes to pushing myself, I feel like I am dishonoring my past self's ambition and drive. I need more of this stalwart-ness in all aspects of my life at the present moment, but especially in the direction of weight loss.

So I've been mediating on what would be the best way to keep me focused on maybe actually getting somewhere with weight loss, and I think minigoals might be the best thing. And when I say minigoals, I mean minigoals. Like "wake up early enough to eat something substantial for breakfast" or "go to bed early enough to get at least six hours of sleep." Those don't really have anything to do with fitness, but I'm more than certain they're major players in the apparent lack of energy I experience every day. As for weight and exercise goals, just keep it super low like "lose half a pound this week." It sounds dumb lol but I have a bad habit of setting lofty goals like a mother fucker. I mean essentially I think everyone has that top rung as their ultimate goal, but for me I feel like I tend to see nothing but where I am and that top rung. I forget I can't just reach out and take it without reaching for all the other rungs between it and myself. Thus I am easily made to think it's impossible and get discouraged. So I'm thinking...simple. "Do five crunches today" "Dance to something with a good beat today" just to get myself started since really all I'm doing is hanging out where I am on the ladder and forlornly looking up at my seemingly impossible though very reachable goals.

It's 11:47pm. I have to wake up at 5:00am and be out of here by 6:30am to go to traffic court. Better get started on sleeping! xD